Hey-o you queers, you. Lesbians, gays, dykes, butches, and all the new straight people that have apparently infiltrated my blog (Chill, you guys are cool, too).
It’s a lazy day over here at this dyke’s house. I stayed up until about three AM last night/this morning watching stand-up comedy and drinking shitty orangeade because I was all out of lemonade that I really wanted. Then I masturbated for another hour before falling asleep, but you guys don’t want to hear about me masturbating, so we’ll move on…
I woke up around nine AM, a habit I’ve quickly formed after waking up at two or three in the afternoon for the past month. The habit started because my girlfriend always woke up around nine o’clock, and would send me a “Good morning” text from her house as soon as she did, so I had to keep myself on her schedule instead of sleeping in another six hours like a lazy-ass. However, my girlfriend recently went back to her base to continue her Marine Corps schooling, so I can’t get in contact with her for another month. Unfortunately, I’m still stuck on this nine AM wake-up call. Fantastic…
Weekdays around here aren’t too exciting, especially when I have nothing fun to blog about. The afternoon consisted of taking the garbage bags out to the dumps, helping my step-dad out with fixing a push mower, and cleaning the house. Thrilling, am I right? Though yesterday I was doing a lot more cleaning, moving a desk from the kitchen into my younger sister’s room. That was all the fun I’ve had all week, in case you need a mental picture of my adventurous life on the weekdays.
I’ll be honest, I have no fucking idea what to blog about right now. That’s why you’re reading this boring post of me trying to entertain you with my weekday hijinks. I’ve received a lot of good and helpful advice for future topics, but I’m just not grasping anything.
I made myself a fantastic sandwich for lunch, though. Half of this beautiful French baguette, filled with layers of roast beef, cheddar cheese slices, iceberg lettuce, and Miracle Whip. No, don’t come at me saying that Miracle Whip is shit, because it is the bona-fide bomb-diggity of mayonnaises. This was a homemade sandwich, because if you’ve read my previous post The Tale of the Subway Sandwich, you’ll know why I don’t buy sandwiches from fast-food places.
Later on I’ll probably go back over the list of topics I have piling up. Maybe I won’t, but expect a post from me either later today or tomorrow. One that doesn’t involve my lunch and daily activities.
Alright, seeya, guys. Have a great day, and stay gay (: